“values in series taking on as real we affect ready gold a steady token flows in unbroken circuit and induces our being, wearies of us as ideal equals that heady crises eddy”

I. The year is 2012, and you are doomed to be an oracle, heckled by the present, vindicated by a future nobody else can see. See, you’re trying to compete for attention with your roommate’s bong to explain that you’ve glimpsed the future, and it is a gilded, wondrous Beacon of Truth, a technology with the very power to deify the Everyman—you disconcertingly notice your roommate eying the bong—known as “Bitcoin.”

One working definition of a bull market: it’s whenever we’re celebrating assholes.